"But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the all-surpassing power belongs to God and not to us."
2 Corinthians 4:7
I know that I blog a lot about Apparent Project and Haiti and how it is changing my life. Today is no exception. Whether is be a sudden "Aha" moment or a slow process of God working deep within my heart, I am just compelled to share. So, I sit here at my computer ready to put into words what God has been up to this time.
When I visited the artisan house in February, Shelley would introduce me to the artisans and to her friends and tell them that I had sold $10,000 worth of product in the last year. I remember the first time she said that. I was taken back as I had not calculated it - but she had been keeping track. The party sales here in the states are the most beneficial for the artisans. They wind up with the most return which means more money for them and their families.
After returning home from Haiti, I knew that God was going to do something big but I didn't know how. My passion and belief for AP was only confirmed and I could NOT be quiet about it. My church embraced it as well and they started talking about it. As I have shared many times, the speaking opportunities and sales events have just fallen in my lap. Strangers call me all the time wanting to see it - hear more about it. Who but God knew that I would be traveling all over, speaking about it to churches and groups and selling ridiculous amounts of jewelry?!?
Between March and September of this year, I did another $18 - 20,000 in jewelry sales. That was mind blowing. It took me 14 months and two Christmases to make the original $10,000. Upon this realization, I was humbled and amazed at God's providential planning and arranging of all of it. I couldn't think long though, as I was gearing up for this Christmas.
It's not even December yet and I have had 16 different AP events with another $10,000 in sales!
$10,000 - in about 6 weeks time! This makes about $40,000 in two years! That's nuts!!!!! Things are slowing down but there are still 7 events on the calendar before Christmas.
It was two years ago that I sat at my computer and wept when I read
this blog. God had been working hard on my heart and deep down, I knew that somehow this was His answer. I just had no idea where it would take me.
Today, I sit here with a better understanding of what it means to be the jar of clay in the above verse.
Each of us were made for a purpose. A plan to be used of God to bring Him glory. So many times we do things because they are "good." We say a prayer, asking God to bless our efforts and we plunge ahead. We get tired and burnt out and we struggle because it's a "good" thing and then we feel guilty.
It may be a good thing - but is it the 'right' or 'most excellent' thing? Is it truly what we are "called" to do? Can we tell others that we know, that we know, that we know, that God has called us to this specific task? Or do we just do it because it's expected or it will make us look good and spiritual to others or even to ourselves as we hide behind service? Keeping ourselves so busy with good things that we don't have to really face what God is trying to do in our hearts.
I went through the "muck" two years ago as God prepared me. He changed my heart about missions and the poor. He held up my chin caused me to
really see other parts of the world and then focused me in on Haiti. He gave me mercy and compassion for photos and stories of people I did not know. As I began to pray for these people, they were no longer photos and stories. They were people. They were no different than me. They have feelings, emotions, desires - no different than mine.
They are Haitian mothers and fathers who desperately LOVE their babies. They don't want to give them to the orphanages - but they know it is the only way they will live. They hold on to them as long as possible - by they time they get to the orphanages, many are dying. I cannot even begin to imagine having to make that decision.
God showed me clearly that the solution to this is not more aid - but jobs. Jobs that give them dignity, jobs that enable them to take care of their families - that give them pride in themselves and what they accomplish.
He made all of this a burning passion in my heart, confirmed it over and over and has given me a platform to share with others.
I am just the vessel. I have not forced or manipulated anything that has happened in the last two years. All of these opportunities have just fallen in my lap and they continue to do so. I didn't just do this because it was a "good" thing to do. I came back from Haiti willing. It has been His all-surpassing power that has caused all of this. I just obey.
As I stand in the middle of it all and look at all that God has done with this - I understand more about being the clay. I could have NEVER done all of this myself. It amazes me often that I don't get burned out. Each time I talk about AP, a fire is ignited inside of me and I get so excited and passionate. It fuels me to keep going. I know that is His work - His power within me. He keeps taking things to new levels and causes me to trust Him in new ways as I shuffle my Calligraphy and my church family and my own family around all of it. Amazingly there is time for it all. The blessings are greater than I could have ever imagined.
I have been pondering all of this for a few weeks. I am guilty of doing things because they are "expected" or "good." I have been burnt out and tired. Not this time. And now that I have experienced what it is like to be the clay - to let it be HIS work and not mine - to step back out of the way and just be the vessel as He makes all these amazing things happen. Well - I pray I never go back to the other. There is a peace and a joy knowing that it is His power - not mine.
Amazing things happen when we allow him to be the potter and we are willing to be the clay. At times it is painful but ALWAYS worth it!
"Yet, O Lord, you are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand."
Jeremiah 64:8
When we allow him - He shapes us into a
useful vessel.
May He receive ALL of the glory.
Now and forever!
